Children are different in many ways. This is true in all aspects. Physical, mental, emotional, and developmental are but a few. All have different hopes and fears that can guide or confuse what they want.
We as parents have a duty to help them figure out what path through life is best for them. I don’t believe we should dictate the path. I see it more as advising and guiding them toward the best path for the individual child, letting them make their mistakes so that they can learn from them.
For some children heights are not an issue. For others it is a really big deal. I was able to be there when my son made a huge accomplishment this summer. He, like his grandfather, and yes me his dad, is afraid of heights.
While we were at Cub Scout adventure camp this summer the boys were given the opportunity to climb a twenty foot vertical wall. I’ll have you know that twenty feet, especially when it is straight up is a huge distance. Jeremy (seven years old) and I sat in line watching all the boys from his den climb this wall. Each boy, including Jeremy, had a climbing harness and helmet on. One at a time the boys would stand, hook up to the belaying line, and call out, “on belay!” The belayer would answer back, “belay on!” Then the climber would get his first hand hold and call out, “climbing!” “Climb on!” the belayer would answer. Up the boy would go quick as a cat up a tree and honk the horn mounted at the top. During all of this as we kept getting closer I could feel the tension raising in my boy. Just before he got up for his turn I squeezed his shoulder and told him that all I ever want to see is his best, that I didn’t care if he made it up all the way I just wanted him to try and to do his best at it.
I can still see and feel his tension as I write this. I wanted so much for him to succeed and banish that hight demon. He hooked up and called out his commands, got his answers and started to climb. Slowly he climbed five feet and froze he couldn’t go on. Finally he had to call out, “descend!” answered by a, “descending” and down he came. He was devastated. I have to give all the boys credit that were there. They all cheered and told him he did great and that it was cool. He would make it. He came to me and I hugged him telling him how proud I was that he did his best and that it was great he made it as high as he did. He squared his shoulders and got a determined look and asked if he could try again. Sure he could if he wanted to. He got back in line. He tried three more times, each time getting just a bit higher on that wall. Each time getting more support from his friends, every man and boy there willing him to move up to the next foot hold and the next hand hold. 
All activities would stop and everyone would concentrate, helping him, and cheering him on. The fourth retry he moved ever so slowly up that dang wall till he made it to the top and honked that horn! Everyone went nuts cheering him almost to the point where the belayer couldn’t hear him call out, “descending!”
It was one of the proudest moments of my life standing back watching him do this by himself and seeing him succeed. I never told him he had to make it up. There was never any pressure from me for him to make it all the way. I just made it known that I wanted him to do his best, whatever that may be. I believe that this is what made the accomplishment so great. It was all him doing his best.
